Okay, I'm a day late, but what the heck. Everyday should be Mother's Day (and Father's Day), anyway. Scripture tells us to honor our father and mother and it doesn't say to do it just one day a year. So... Happy Mother's Day!
Yesterday, in honor of Mother's Day, during our church service three mother's shared there experiences on being a Christian mom. (Of course, my son and husband were quick to point out that I "didn't make the top 3," since I wasn't asked to speak! There's nothing like a huge dose of humility from your family.) All three women did a wonderful job. Among other ideas, they shared things like teaching their toddlers to pray and sing praise songs; 12 things they pray for their teenagers each day; providing their children with a toolbox for life; and praying for the right mate for their child. As they shared, I realized I didn't do any of those things. Good thing I didn't make the "top 3", as I couldn't imagine what I would have had to share in comparison.
You see, when Chad was a baby, we didn't go to church. At times, I wasn't even sure how I felt about God or what (or even if) I believed about God. Last night, as I was picking up the house, God impressed on me that I did have something to share. So, here it is...
For years, motherhood was not in my future. Before Dennis and I got married, instead of discusssing how we would raise our children, we agreed that we would not have children. It wasn't that we couldn't, we didn't know one way or the other, it was just that we were choosing not to have children. Well, at least that's what we agreed. Then about seven or eight years into our marriage, I had a change of heart. I wanted to have a baby. The problem was, Dennis hadn't had a change of heart. Then one day, out of the blue, Dennis told me that he was in. He agreed that we could try to have a baby; but only ONE.
As I stated before, at that point in my life, God really wasn't in the picture; but all the same, I prayed. I told God that if he wanted me to have more than one child, he needed to give me twins, because I would never get Dennis to agree to a second child. Although twins weren't in the picture, a beautiful, healthy baby boy was; and along with him, God entered the picture as well.
I still remember the day we brought Chad home from the hospital. I sat his carrier down in the floor and just looked at him, and cried. How could anything be so perfect? Of all the things that could go wrong, nothing did. All of his body parts were there and functioning! He was a miracle. And, at that moment it became clear to me that I had to believe in God, because only God could create a miracle like that.
Still, no church, no nightly prayers, no teaching faith or memorizing scriptures. When Chad was 3 we enrolled him in a Christian day care. Somewhere, between day care and my mom, Chad's curiosity in God came to light. By the time he was 5, he began to ask questions about God that I couldn't answer. So, I decided it was time to go to church. I told Dennis that Chad was asking questions about God that I couldn't answer, so I thought I needed to take him to church. Dennis thought that was an okay idea, as long as I understood that he wasn't interested in going with us. So off we went. We attended an area Methodist church for a couple of years, and we eventually landed at Acts 2. A couple of years ago, Dennis even began to come with us.
Chad is now 16 and he's a great kid. Sometimes a wonder how, because he definitely doesn't have a top 3 mom. His mom doesn't even make the top 10. But, with a lot of help, and plenty of errors, here's what I've learned about being a Christian mom:
1. Never quit loving your child and never quit telling them that you love them, even when they don't want to hear it.
2. Talk to them and make them talk to you. And when they do talk, do your best to listen.
3. Pray for your child. Most of the time, I don't know what to pray for Chad, so I just remind myself, and God, that first of all Chad is God's child, and he is only on loan to me. I tell God that although, I'm far from perfect, I know that He is perfect and can overcome any mistakes that I make and I ask God, "just don't let me screw him up".
4. Live by example. Unfortunately for me, this too often means learning to admit when I'm wrong, and apologizing for my mistakes.
5. Remember, that God's gives each of us free will, including our children. It is very possible that even if you are a "top 3" mom, your child will make bad choices. When they do, allow them to suffer the natural (and parent imposed) consequences of those choices, and pray even more.
6. Never quit loving your child and never quit telling them that you love them, even when they don't want to hear it. (I know I already said that, but I think it bears making the list twice.)
7. Most importantly, remember that God is in charge and He only wants the best for you and your child. Even if you're not a "top 3" parent, the #1 parent has your back!
You see, for me (and I believe for God too) it doesn't matter where a mom ranks on a list, or whether you start being a Christian mom when your child is born or long after. What does matter is that your child knows that God is an intrical part of your life, and that if he so chooses, God will be an intrical part of his life as well. Let him know that you are going to your best to help him along the way, but at times you will fail; however, if he choose to depend on God, God will not fail him.
"Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God- children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God." John 1:12-13
My prayer:
God, you have given me the miraculous gift of a child, your child, to raise. Thank you for trusting me with something so precious. Help me to always, look to you for guidance in this enormous task; and when I forget to look to you first, please come along beside me and pick up the pieces and show me how fix my mess; and help me to always remember that he is your child, too. Amen.
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