Why Should I Hurry?

All around I hear people saying "hurry up", "hurry, you need to decide", or just plain "HURRY!". As I was thinking this week about a friend who's important life decision seemed to be in part based on beating a time line, I began to ponder the concept of making decisions in a hurry.

So, as I often do when I want to know more, I pulled out my Bible (I started with the NIV) and looked in the concordance. Lo and behold, right there between hurl and hurt was nothing! Hurry was mysteriously absent. Not to be deterred, I went for my NRSV Bible. This time, the surrounding words were hungry and husband, but still no hurry. King James Version - no hurry. New Century Version - no hurry. (Can a person have too many Bibles?) My version of The Message doesn't have a concordance; but if it did, I'm guessing still no hurry. (Of course, with The Message, one can't be sure.)

In each of these versions of the Bible we are told to seek, go, stand, come and wait, but not to hurry. Jesus never hurried. Even when his friend Lazerus was dying, Jesus waited two days before he left for Lazerus' home. So why then, are we all so obsessed with being in a hurry to do, to decide, to go? It seems we're all afraid if we don't hurry up we'll miss out. But the truth is, we miss out, at least on the things that matter most, because we're in too much of a hurry.

So what does this mean? For me, it means if someone is telling me I need to make decision in a hurry, that someone is not God. And whatever they are wanting me decide probably isn't of God either.

Of course, if you're around our house on Sunday morning, you'll most likely still hear me shouting, "Chad, hurry up! We're going to be late for church." But then, I'm not God, I'm the Momma and sometimes Mom's just have to keep the world moving. You know what they say, "If Momma ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy!"

I guess, I'll just have to keep working on this one.

Hold me

As a child when we are tired, scared, uncertain or just want to be closer or higher up, we stretch out our arms to someone we trust, usually our parent - our provider, and say, "Hold me". In response, our parent reaches down and takes us into his or her arms and holds us tightly.

Now, imagine your relationship with God in that way... envision yourself stretching your arms up as high as you possibly can and saying, "Hold me... hold me". In response, God the Father reaches down and lifts you up, wrapping you tightly in His arms where you are safe, secure and loved. You can even lay your head on His shoulder and nestle into his neck and rest. What an amazing sight!

That sight is a reality available to each and every of us, if we only ask: "Hold me, Lord, hold me." Best of all, unlike our own children, we never get to big for God the Father to pick us up.

What a great day to be nestled in the arms of God!

"And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them." Mark 10:16

My Prayer:

Hold me.

I'M HOPELESS!

I’m hopeless!

The more I read; the more I study; the more I experience; the more I move closer toward God, the more hopeless I realize I am - - - - - - without God!

It’s really hard to be kind and courteous to the lady and her unruly child sitting next to you. It’s really hard to reach out and speak kind words to the person with bad breath sitting next to you. (And it’s REALLY, REALLY hard when you’re stuck between them both on the airplane!) It’s really hard to show love to those that choose a life style that is opposed to scripture and your basic beliefs. It’s really hard not to begrudge those who rattle on, seemingly just to be heard, causing you delay.

Last week, I encountered all of these situations and more. Alone, I am hopeless. I am short (not just in height), rude and judgmental. With God, I’m still not there, but am getting better (the last one really tripped me up though) and, I now realize that I can actually be where God wants me to be if I always remember to turn everything over to Him at the outset --- and not in hindsight.

What I am learning is if Christ truly dwells within, then doing the loving thing isn’t all that hard. It’s when I try to do the good thing on my own that things go amuck. Without God, I can do nothing. With Him, I can do all things.

“…God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has
given to us.” Romans 5:15

My prayer:
God, fill me with your loving Spirit. Let your presence overtake my entire being so there is nothing left but you! Let your thoughts be mine, that I may love as I have never dared before and see others in the loving light in which you created them. Amen.

Why is it so hard?

A few days ago, a friend of mine said to me, “Relationships are so hard!” My immediate response shocked me. “Not really”, I retorted. What? Did I just hear myself? - Not really? Where did that come from? Haven’t I thought that very thing a hundred times? As my words continued, I knew they weren’t from me. Something much greater was at work in that room.

I went on to explain to her, the only relationship that really matters is this one. I picked up a piece of paper and wrote two names, hers and God’s. Then I drew a two way arrow between the names. It looked like this:
GOD
↕
KATHY

It was so clear to me at that moment; the only relationship that really matters is the one between you (me) and God. That is the basis for all other relationships. We always hear people telling us, “you need to work on your marriage”, or “you need to work on your relationship with your children”. But the truth is we need to work on our relationship with God. It is only through a strong relationship with God that any other relationship can be strong. How obvious, yet I had never realized it before that moment; as my relationship with God has deepened, so have my other relationships. As my love for God has deepened, so has my love for others. As my joy in God has deepened, so has my joy in life. As my relationship with God has grown, my other relationships have grown and become “easier”.

Then I added one more thing to my drawing. I encircled the names with a heart, symbolizing the deep love that God has for her, and for you, and for me. You see, my relationship with God is the only one that is certain – that is forever. All other relationships are temporary and can be gone in a minute – but God is always there. He will never leave you or forsake you. (Joshua 1:5)

The relationship I have to work on is my relationship with God, and I have to work on it everyday. If I can get that relationship right, then the world becomes a much easier place.

“I am the first and the last.” Isaiah 44:6, Isaiah 48:12, Revelation 1:17
(If he said it 3 times, he must really mean it!)

My Prayer: Lord, help me to remember to always put you first; to remember that my relationship with you is an ongoing, never ending process. Help me to focus on you and your love, so that your love flows through to everyone I encounter. Amen.

Happy Independence Day!

Happy Independence Day! What a great day! Fireworks – parades – friends – family - a day of celebration honoring our country’s independence. I love Independence Day! It’s the basis of our country, our celebration of freedom.

We are taught from an early age to be independent – to learn to feed ourselves; dress ourselves; do it ourselves. We cherish the first time we can walk to our friend’s house alone or ride our bike around the block without Mom or Dad. We can’t wait to drive ourselves to school; to move out of our parent’s house; to be on our own. With all of the talk and striving to become independent, no wonder the Christian life seems so hard – the Christian life where we are taught we should be totally dependent (not independent) on God. How can that be? That is exactly the opposite of what we’ve been taught and strived for all of our lives. No wonder it seems so difficult.

But, when you really think about it, maybe it’s not all that complicated. (Right, you say!) When we truly turn our focus on God and become totally dependent on him, aren’t we really just declaring our independence from other things? Our independence from worldly wants and desires. Our independence from greed. Our independence from worry. Our independence from self reliance. Our independence from anger and hatred. So today as you celebrate our country’s independence, remember what our forefathers were fighting for in their fight for independence – the freedom of religion – freedom to choose how they (and we) could serve and worship God – not freedom from God. They declared their independence in order that they could be dependent on God!

As you celebrate our country’s independence, don’t forget to celebrate your dependence on a God who loves you and will never forsake you. Happy Independence Day!

Happy Mother's Day

Okay, I'm a day late, but what the heck. Everyday should be Mother's Day (and Father's Day), anyway. Scripture tells us to honor our father and mother and it doesn't say to do it just one day a year. So... Happy Mother's Day!

Yesterday, in honor of Mother's Day, during our church service three mother's shared there experiences on being a Christian mom. (Of course, my son and husband were quick to point out that I "didn't make the top 3," since I wasn't asked to speak! There's nothing like a huge dose of humility from your family.) All three women did a wonderful job. Among other ideas, they shared things like teaching their toddlers to pray and sing praise songs; 12 things they pray for their teenagers each day; providing their children with a toolbox for life; and praying for the right mate for their child. As they shared, I realized I didn't do any of those things. Good thing I didn't make the "top 3", as I couldn't imagine what I would have had to share in comparison.

You see, when Chad was a baby, we didn't go to church. At times, I wasn't even sure how I felt about God or what (or even if) I believed about God. Last night, as I was picking up the house, God impressed on me that I did have something to share. So, here it is...

For years, motherhood was not in my future. Before Dennis and I got married, instead of discusssing how we would raise our children, we agreed that we would not have children. It wasn't that we couldn't, we didn't know one way or the other, it was just that we were choosing not to have children. Well, at least that's what we agreed. Then about seven or eight years into our marriage, I had a change of heart. I wanted to have a baby. The problem was, Dennis hadn't had a change of heart. Then one day, out of the blue, Dennis told me that he was in. He agreed that we could try to have a baby; but only ONE.

As I stated before, at that point in my life, God really wasn't in the picture; but all the same, I prayed. I told God that if he wanted me to have more than one child, he needed to give me twins, because I would never get Dennis to agree to a second child. Although twins weren't in the picture, a beautiful, healthy baby boy was; and along with him, God entered the picture as well.

I still remember the day we brought Chad home from the hospital. I sat his carrier down in the floor and just looked at him, and cried. How could anything be so perfect? Of all the things that could go wrong, nothing did. All of his body parts were there and functioning! He was a miracle. And, at that moment it became clear to me that I had to believe in God, because only God could create a miracle like that.

Still, no church, no nightly prayers, no teaching faith or memorizing scriptures. When Chad was 3 we enrolled him in a Christian day care. Somewhere, between day care and my mom, Chad's curiosity in God came to light. By the time he was 5, he began to ask questions about God that I couldn't answer. So, I decided it was time to go to church. I told Dennis that Chad was asking questions about God that I couldn't answer, so I thought I needed to take him to church. Dennis thought that was an okay idea, as long as I understood that he wasn't interested in going with us. So off we went. We attended an area Methodist church for a couple of years, and we eventually landed at Acts 2. A couple of years ago, Dennis even began to come with us.

Chad is now 16 and he's a great kid. Sometimes a wonder how, because he definitely doesn't have a top 3 mom. His mom doesn't even make the top 10. But, with a lot of help, and plenty of errors, here's what I've learned about being a Christian mom:

1. Never quit loving your child and never quit telling them that you love them, even when they don't want to hear it.

2. Talk to them and make them talk to you. And when they do talk, do your best to listen.

3. Pray for your child. Most of the time, I don't know what to pray for Chad, so I just remind myself, and God, that first of all Chad is God's child, and he is only on loan to me. I tell God that although, I'm far from perfect, I know that He is perfect and can overcome any mistakes that I make and I ask God, "just don't let me screw him up".

4. Live by example. Unfortunately for me, this too often means learning to admit when I'm wrong, and apologizing for my mistakes.

5. Remember, that God's gives each of us free will, including our children. It is very possible that even if you are a "top 3" mom, your child will make bad choices. When they do, allow them to suffer the natural (and parent imposed) consequences of those choices, and pray even more.

6. Never quit loving your child and never quit telling them that you love them, even when they don't want to hear it. (I know I already said that, but I think it bears making the list twice.)

7. Most importantly, remember that God is in charge and He only wants the best for you and your child. Even if you're not a "top 3" parent, the #1 parent has your back!

You see, for me (and I believe for God too) it doesn't matter where a mom ranks on a list, or whether you start being a Christian mom when your child is born or long after. What does matter is that your child knows that God is an intrical part of your life, and that if he so chooses, God will be an intrical part of his life as well. Let him know that you are going to your best to help him along the way, but at times you will fail; however, if he choose to depend on God, God will not fail him.

"Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God- children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God." John 1:12-13

My prayer:

God, you have given me the miraculous gift of a child, your child, to raise. Thank you for trusting me with something so precious. Help me to always, look to you for guidance in this enormous task; and when I forget to look to you first, please come along beside me and pick up the pieces and show me how fix my mess; and help me to always remember that he is your child, too. Amen.

The Empty Tomb

I love the empty tomb! I had never really thought much about that before, but today I recognized that I LOVE the empty tomb! The empty tomb means that Jesus is alive and well, and with me. It means that he is greater than death and cannot be defeated by man. He's like the super hero that never dies. Like Superman, without the kryptonite weakness. He is my hero! The one that rescues me over and over. The one that "suddenly" appears when things are at their worse. (Of course he was there all along just waiting on me to call on him.)

His nemesis's are many - greed - control - hate - lust; just to name a few. However, they are powerless against him; as His strength is love -unfailing, undying love! Jesus is definitely my super hero. Yet, he's much more than that - he's my Saviour, who gives me eternal life.

"I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know... his incomparable great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is the body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way." Ephesians 1:18-21

My prayer:

God, thank you for the empty tomb, and for your son, Jesus, whom you sent to save me from the nemesis's of the world, my sins. I trust that by my salvation through Jesus Christ, you have saved me though I am not worthy of being saved. Thank you for your unfailing love. In Christ's name I pray. Amen.

It's about time!

It has been very difficult for me to write lately. God has still been giving me insights, but I just haven't been able to get everything to mesh: my thoughts; God's words; my pen; my focus - it just wasn't working.

There didn't seem to be a real reason, but it just wasn't working. So I decided (with God's prodding) I needed to examine why I was writing - what was my real motive - was I doing it for God's purposes or my own? Or perhaps a little of both. What I discovered is that starting a blog was me testing God's wisdom.

About 7 years ago God laid on my heart that I was suppose to write a book. He even gave me a title: "Free at Last: Confessions of a Control Freak". (It's okay to laugh.) Of course, being the submissive follower of God that I am, I did nothing about it. Why would I? I had no writing ability. Don't believe me? Just ask my legal writing professor from law school who gave me an F on my first paper! How in the world could someone who made an F in writing possibly be a writer?

Turn the clock ahead 7 years... God is still laying on my heart that I am to write a book. So, do I believe Him? Of course not. Instead, I go my own way and check things out to see if He could possibly know what He is doing. First, I share a couple of things I've written with a few friends and test their responses. When those were positive, I did what any trusting, submissive (read: doubting, questioning) child of God would do... I tested His knowledge further by starting a blog and telling my friends what I was doing (except for the part about testing God's knowledge). One of the first responses I received was from a friend that said - you should write a book. Hmmm... I wonder where that came from? But again, I did nothing about writing a book. Instead, I kept praying, "God, show me what you want me to do." I can just see him shaking his head, wanting to scream at me (like I have been known to do at my own child) "HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU???? WRITE A BOOK!

God knows what He has in store for us. He knows the things we are capable of, even though we doubt our own capabilities. God doesn't make mistakes and He will not call us to anything we are not capable of through Him. Although my heart knows these things, my head seems to be a bit on the slow side. Perhaps 7 years is long enough and it's time I started listening and submitting , and quit asking the question that God has already answered.

Is there something God is calling you to do? If so, there's no time like now to respond to the call.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding..." Proverbs 3:5

My Prayer:

Lord, forgive me for doubting and questioning you; for not listening to your answers to my prayers. Thank you for being patient and not giving up on me. Now that I acknowledge what you are calling me to do, guide me in the steps I need to take to follow your calling. Amen.

Making A Difference

Saturday I had the honor of celebrating the life of Brady Thomas Meyer. Brady is a triplet. He lived in utero for 30 weeks and on this earth for 14 days. As I prepared to attend his memorial service, it occurred to me that Brady had most likely accomplished more for God's kingdom in 14 days than I have in 47 years.

During his short time on this earth Brady touched and affected the lives of hundreds and hundreds of people throughout the country. During his life, he brought many people closer to God than they had ever been - some who rarely or never pray, began to pray; some who occasionally pray, prayed harder and more often; many who had never fasted, spent 24 hours in prayer and fasting for Brady. And all of those prayers were answered, maybe not in the way we had hoped for, but answered none the less.

His life also allowed us to watch true faith being lived out in the lives of his parents, Andy and Cathy, whose faith has been steadfast in what many of us would perceive as the worst of tragedies.

In celebration and honor of Brady, and his family (parents Andy & Cathy, big brother Eli, and sister and brother, Jordan and Drew), I challenge each of us to examine our own discipleship and ask, "Am I making a difference?". My guess is you probably are. Then ask, "Could I be doing more?"

In 14 short days, Brady Thomas Meyer touched hundreds of lives. How many lives will you touch in the time God gives you?

"Then [Jesus] said to them, "Whoever welcomes this little child in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me welcomes the one who sent me. For he who is least among you all - he is the greatest." " Luke 9:48

My prayer:

Thank you for the Meyer family and the difference they are making for your kingdom. Lord, I too want to make a difference for your kingdom. Show me what you would have me do and then give me the strength and courage to do it. Amen.

Note: To learn more about the journey of the Meyer's and the lives of Brady, Jordan, Drew and Eli, you may visit their web site at: www.babyhomepages.net/andycathy_meyer.

Isaiah 40:31

If you follow my blog you know that I have a love for dogs. Our dogs constantly remind me of my walk with God, including the fact that I'm sure there are times that God wishes I wore a choke collar! Perhaps then, when I head off in the wrong direction and God tries to redirect me, I would be a bit more responsive.

The link below was shared with me by two dear friends. It is the story of a dog named Isaiah 40:31, and shares a message about what we can learn from a dog about obedience. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKohJ1k4oKA

I guess, if I obeyed as well as this dog, God wouldn't need a choke collar!

"[Jesus] relied, "Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and
obey it."" Luke 11:28

My prayer:
God, teach me to hear your command and to follow it. Remind me that when you tell me no, it is not to be mean, but is often to protect me from thing I cannot see, but that you can see. Help me to trust you in all things and to obey your commands. Amen.

Cheers!

This week has been a bit nostalgic. Earlier this week I read that the bartender at the original "Cheers" bar, the one that the television show was based on, was laid off. Immediately, I recounted the show that brought Dennis and I many laughs. And of course, I began to sing the theme song:

Where Everybody Knows Your Name
by Gary Portnoy and Judy Hart Angelo
Cheers Lyrics
"Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got.
Taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot.
Wouldn't you like to get away?
Sometimes you want to go
Where everybody knows your name, and they're always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see, our troubles are all the same
You wanna be where everybody knows Your name.
You wanna go where people know, people are all the same,
You wanna go where everybody knows your name..."

I can remember Dennis and I discussing how great it would be to have a place like Cheers to hang out in - where everybody did know your name and they were always glad to see you. We had a place to hang out in our college years that was a bit like Cheers (please, don't tell my mom!). I must admit it was great to walk into the room and know most everyone there. It gave us a sense of belonging. Of course, time passed and we all left college and went our different ways.

This week as I listened to the lyrics, I realized that no matter how many "Cheers" you find in your lifetime, they really never last. Even on the show things changed: Coach died; Diane left; Frasier moved on to his own show and split with Lillith. Woody and Rebecca showed up and Sam was really bald!

However, over the years I've discovered there is another place I can go where someone knows my name and is ALWAYS glad to see me - - in the presence of God. Not only does he know my name; he knows everything about me. Most importantly, he never gets cancelled or moves on to better things. He is the one thing I can always count on.

Making my way in the world today sure does take a lot!
Taking a break from all my worries should would help a lot!
Sometimes I want to go where somebody knows my name!
And He's always glad I came...

Wouldn't it be great if we chose to be there all of the time?

"... He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out." John 10:3

My prayer:
Lord God, I thank you that you know me by name and you are always joyful to have me in your presence. Help me to always seek your presence and to accept the comfort, joy and freedom from worries that you have for me there. Amen.


In case I hit your nostalgic button as well, here's a video of the theme song and clips from the show. I hope you enjoy it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N6HI1pjfHlc&feature=related

Grace or Guilt?

My sweet friend Laura has a wonderful relationship with God. If you read her comment to my last post ("A Lent Perspective"), you might also know that she has a long running love affair with guilt. On Laura's behalf (and on behalf of thousands of us, who are just like her), I decided to do a little exploring about guilt.

According to my NIV Study Bible, the word guilt appears in the Bible 6 times. Conversely, the word grace appears in the Bible 130 times. Hmmm... makes you wonder doesn't it? Do you think God is trying to tell us something?

To explore this idea a little further, I pulled out my trusty bible dictionary (Unger's Concise Bible Dictionary) and looked up the words guilt and grace. Grace is defined as "the manifestation of God's love and mercy toward sinful men" (I'm pretty sure that includes women too!). Here's what Unger's has to say about guilt: "Guilt is liability for sin committed or wrong enacted. Divine grace has triumphed over sin by removing the guilt of all who trust in Jesus Christ's atoning death (Rom. 8:1)". Amazing! Grace is included in the very definition of guilt.

No wonder grace appears 124 more times than guilt; by it's very definition God's grace is greater than any guilt (self-imposed or otherwise) we can ever imagine. One of the most incredible thing about grace is that we cannot earn or buy it. In our church we have an acronym for Grace: God's Riches At Christ's Expense. Grace doesn't come at our expense. Jesus Christ already paid the price. All we have to do is accept it. It seems that to do anything less is to deny Christ's sacrifice for us.

Christ has purchased us the gift of grace. God is holding it out in front of us offering it to us. It's an enormous gift. So, in order to receive it, we have to set aside the guilt package we are carrying and open our hands to receive God's love and mercy.

So what choice will you make? Grace or guilt? It's totally up to you.

I can promise you that grace is definitely the better choice. Of course that's easy for me to say... it only took me 24 years of wallowing in guilt and unforgiveness before I was ready to choose God's grace. I hope for your sake, you're a much quicker learner than I was.

"...My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9

My prayer:

Jesus, thank you for paying the price for my sin and guilt. Give me the courage and strength to let go of my own self reliance and guilt, and accept the gift of God's mercy and love through His all sufficient grace. Amen.

A Lent Perspective

As we celebrate the season of lent, many have spent countless hours trying to figure out what they will give up this lenten season. As I listened to one such discussion this week, I heard several people express concerns about being afraid of failing at lent: "I could give up candy, but I would be sure to fail." or "I told my children to be careful what they gave up, because they didn't want to set themselves up to fail". For myself, I don't dare attempt to fast from food. I can barely make from breakfast to lunch, much less sun up to sun down.

As I replayed these conversations in my mind, I envisioned God smiling and shaking his head back and forth, saying, "They just don't get it." You see, I don't think it's really that big of a deal to God if we "fail". It's the trying that counts. The commitment to give God more of ourselves, and focus more on Him today, than we did yesterday, is what it's really all about. So if you've already stumbled on your lent commitment, that's okay. Pick yourself up and try again. Who knows maybe this time you'll make it 30 minutes longer without candy. The important thing is that we don't give up trying and we don't give up on God. For He certainly never gives up on us!

"But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded." 2 Chronicles 15:7

My Prayer

God, thank you for never giving up on me, even when I fail over and over. Help me to remember that my greatest growth most comes in the journey not at the finish line. As I celebrate the lenten season, help me to remember that it truly should be a time of celebration non a time of woe. Today, I celebrate your love which is so great, that you gave your only son to save me, a sinner. Thank you for his great sacrifice and your great love. Amen.

Stuck in the Wilderness, Again

Well, here I am, stuck in the wilderness again. It's been known to happen to me from time to time, and here I am again. Perhaps you've experienced it as well. For me, it's a feeling of so many different things tugging at my heart, mind and soul. All of them possibly valid. All of them possibly dirction from God. Yet, all pulling different directions and leaving me in a quandry of how to respond. So, I don't. For the most part, much like the Isrealites in the wilderness, I just wander around trying to get out, but not knowing which exit to take. It's a crazy feeling. My heart and soul know that God is in the midst of it (whatever "it" is), but my mind just can't get clear enough to align with the rest of me.

So, how do I get out here? For me, the answer is "I" don't; but, by relying on God, I will. I just hope it doesn't take 40 years like it did for the Isrealites! Until then, I must put my trust and hope in the Lord and wait on His direction, at His appointed time.

"Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!" Psalm 27:14 KJ

"For the vision is yet for an appointed time; but at the end it will speak, and it will not lie. Though it tarries, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry." Habakkuk 2:3 KJ

My prayer:
Thank you for being in the midst of my wilderness, and for never leaving me or forsaking me. Lord, give me the courage and strength to wait on you. Provide me with your clarity and vision for my life. Amen.

Running with the Big Dogs

Much of my adult life has been spent avoiding exercise, and quite honestly, I did an excellent job of avoidance for many years. However, a couple of years ago I got tricked into exercising. We were having a very hot summer. So hot in fact, that our dogs were having no fun. All they wanted to do was lay in the air conditioning and sleep. Even the evenings were too hot to take them out for a walk. So, I decided, in their best interest, I would get up and take them for a walk early in the morning before it got too hot. And so it began... and it was nothing like I had envisioned. What I had forseen as a leisurely walk around the neighborhood was actually two big dogs dragging me around the neighborhood huffing and puffing.

I decided that something had to change. These dogs were out of control (more like in control, of me) and I needed to show them who was boss. But, no matter how many episodes of "The Dog Whisperer" I watched, they still wanted to run. With no sign of Cesar in site to get them under control, I began to pick up my pace and try to keep up with them. After all, they did need the exercise and I couldn't send them out by themselves. Someone had to sacrifice and that someone was going to be me.

Here we are over two years later, and four days or so a week I still drag myself out of bed to run with our dogs. Okay, "run" may be a bit of an exaggeration; but anyway, I get out there and do more than walk. I never would have thought it in the begining, but I actually look forward to our run. Not only has it been good for me physically, it has also taught me a great deal spiritually.

Many mornings, as we head back towards home, there is a winding section of the street where I will close my eyes and let the dogs lead me as we run. As I run with my eyes closed, I am overcome with freedom. I envision what it must truly be like to let God lead me. On the best days, which don't come often, one dog will be on either side of me. With my eyes closed I rely on my other senses. I listen for the sound of cars. I feel the tug of the dogs’ leashes guiding me. Occasionally, I take a peak to make sure we are on track, but for the most part I let the dogs lead. I imagine this must be how it is when we truly turn everything over to God. The Holy Spirit is surrounding us, and we get to run hand in hand with Jesus on one side, and the Father on the other, together keeping us between the lines. It's an incredible feeling even though it usually lasts only a moment, until I am abruptly brought back to reality. Like this morning when Easton took a detour and took me stumbling into a neighbor's yard. (Thank goodness we have sloping curbs in our neighborhood and not 90 degree angles.) But side tracking is part of the journey as well. I relate that to worldly temptations pulling me off God’s track. But the other dog is there to pull against the temptation and pull me back on track, much like Jesus or the Holy Spirit do in my spiritual walk. It is an amazing thing to give up control and trust that you are being let on the right path. It is an incredible freedom that I never recognized until I was brave enough to run with the big dogs, with my eyes shut.

Of course, as an attorney, I have to disclaim that I do not recommend that you run with your eyes shut. You may get hurt.

"...let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix
our eys on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our our faith..."Hebrews
12:1-2

My prayer:
Jesus, show me how to walk hand in hand with you; to fix my eyes upon you so that the ways of the world do not pull me off your chosen path. Give me the courage to close my eyes to the world and seek your presence where ever I am and allow you to lead me along life's winding paths. Amen.

My How Time Flies...

Today is Chad's 16th birthday! They sure grow up fast. It seems like only yesterday... yada, yada, yada. Anyway, as I was reflecting back over the past 16 years, I guess I've done a little growing up of my own. Well, at least you could say I've learned a few things along the way.

Like most expectant parents, Dennis and I signed up, and showed up, for childbirth classes. I must admit nothing they said in that class or that my doctor said prepared me for what was to come. For instance, I don't remember anyone saying that you shouldn't eat a foot long chili cheese dog (yes, all by myself), and try to run across the parking lot to avoid the freezing cold (no, I didn't have a coat on because I didn't have one that would wrap around my gigantic belly) the night before you go into labor. No, they didn't tell me that. I had to learn the hard way, around 3:30 a.m. when the foot long chili cheese dog decided it didn't like it down there. Nor, did anyone really explain that thing about the water breaking. Of course I had seen it on TV shows, but that was the depth of my knowledge. My first thought was - "What an idiot, now I've gone and peed on myself". Of course once I couldn't stop it I began to realize it might be something else.

Fourteen and a half hours later, we were parents. And we still didn't have a clue. And, I'm not sure we still do, when it comes to parenting. It's one of those things that you just have to keep working at and hope you don't totally screw up, especially when you only have one kid to practice on.

The great thing about kids is that they are resilient and ever changing. Each year brings new joys and new challenges. As far as I'm concerned, each year just keeps getting better and I wouldn't go back in time if I could. Oh sure, we could have done some things different, and probably better, but then we wouldn't have learned the valuable lessons that followed.

One thing I do know though, is that the birth of that beautiful baby boy was also the birth of a rekindled relationship with God. Today, I'm thankful for them both. I just hope that God thinks that life with me keeps getting better, too. Somehow, I think he does.

"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: with the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day." 2 Peter 3:8

My Prayer:

God, thank you for letting me see but a glimpse of your love for all your children, in my love for my son. Teach me to expand my love to all people and to act out of love in all things. Amen.

COME ON REF!

I yell at referees. I can't help it. I try not to. Sometimes I even try really hard not to. But then, they do it. They make some bone head call and here I go. "Come on.... That is NOT a charge. There's NO way he was set," or maybe, "That's a foul! COME ON REF! Make the call!" You get the idea.

For a while I quit trying not to yell. I had been to a basketball game and heard a nun, wearing a full habit, yelling at the ref, "Hey BUCKO! Quit trying to even up the score!" (For the record, her team was ahead by 20 points or so.) So, like any well intentioned basketball fan, I interpreted it as a sign from God. As long as I call him BUCKO, it's okay to yell! The problem is Bucko just doesn't flow for me. So I'm back to COME ON REF.

At least I was until last night. Last night, as we were walking into our son's basketball game, the referee was walking in at the same time. I offered to let him go ahead, as we were walking fairly slow. He chuckled and said he was in no real hurry. I laughed and told him I could understand that since I would probably be yelling at him in a little while. He replied, "Well, you won't be the first and certainly won't be the last." We all laughed together and then parted ways as we went into the gym. Then, an amazing thing happened. I didn't yell at him. Of course he made a couple of "bone head" calls. My husband's uncle even said, "Now, you can yell at him". But I didn't. Overall he called a pretty good game. Especially considering the other referee didn't show and he had to call the game by himself. But it was more than that. He had showed up knowing that someone (like me) was going to judge every call he made, and eventually, someone (like me) was going to yell at him. Yet, he still showed up. He showed up in spike of people like me, so the kids could play the game.

It makes me wonder. If every morning when I left the house, I knew that a crowd of people were judging my every decision, and if I messed up someone would yell out loud and point out my mistake, would I show up? "COME ON LADY! Get it right! What's wrong with you?" If that's what I had to look forward to would I ever leave my house? I wonder, would just quit showing up or would I have the fortitude to show up anyway.

Tonight, I'll get another chance to yell, or not yell, at the referees. Hopefully I'll remember last night's encounter and leave the yelling to someone else. If you don't judge or yell at refs this probably makes no sense to you. But, think about this: Who is your referee? Is there someone in your life that you are especially hard on? Someone that you judge or comment on everything they do? If so, that someone just might be your referee.

"There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you- who are you to judge your neighbor?" James 4:12 NIV

My Prayer:

God, help me to remember that we are all your children and we all make mistakes. Help me to work on my own short comings and quit pointing out the other guy's. Thank you for those that have the courage to still show up even when they know they will be judged and yelled at. Give me the courage to keep showing up just in case I get it right. Most of all God, thank you for loving me even when I yell at referees. Amen.

Love

Love. A simple four letter word that is anything but simple. If you're from my generation, you might remember the movie, "Love Story", from the 1970's, and the famous line that came from the movie, "Love is never having to say you're sorry." Everyone was saying it, but I just couldn't get it! What do they mean love is never having to say you're sorry. How lame! If you love someone, you would want to tell them you're sorry when you do something wrong or hurt them. That is insane. What are they talking about? Do they mean that if you really love someone they will know you are sorry? Or, are they saying the person you love would never require you to say you're sorry? I have to admit, I just never got it! Until today...

Whether they knew it or not, they were talking about the kind of love that many of us have never experienced. The kind of love that is only possible through God. It's the kind of love that Paul wrote about in Corinthians ("love is patient, love is kind...) and again in Romans. It is the kind of love that we can only experience with Jesus Christ living in and through us. The reason love means never having to say you're sorry is because love never causes hurt. It is only when we (or someone else) act without love that hurt occurs. Funny thing. I've read it many times, but just never got it. So for today, I am going to try to act only out of love. Hmmm. I wonder if I can make it until tomorrow before I need to tell someone I'm sorry. Well, here goes.

"Love never hurts a neighbor, so loving is obeying all the law".
Romans 13:10

My prayer:

Lord, thank you for making it all so simple (though often hard for me). Thank you that I don't have to memorize a list of do's and don'ts; that all I have to remember is to love. Show me how to love you as deeply as you love me; and, to love others, even when they don't seem very loveable. When I fail, give me the wisdom and grace to acknowledge my failures and to ask forgiveness from those that I have failed to love. Amen.

Trust Me

Our family has two dogs, Shasta and Easton (left, Easton; right, Shasta). Both of them are rescue dogs, yet they have completely different personalities and life experiences. Easton was adopted from Free to Live, a no-kill sanctuary in our area. Unfortunately, before arriving at Free to Live, Easton was abused. His scar tissued ears are an everyday reminder that people and life can be very cruel. Since his arrival in our home, Easton has flourished. He is still skiddish and afraid of many things (especially loud noises like the vacuum cleaner). For the most part, I think he knows he is safe and loved; yet he is still mindful of how things once were and how unkind the world can be.

This morning as Easton came to me for attention and his morning head rub, I looked into his deep brown eyes, and told him, "I wish I could get into your mind and help you to understand. To understand that you are safe and loved, and that I will always do everything in my power to keep you from harm."

As those words rolled out of my mouth, I thought of my relationship with God. He must have spoken similar words to me, time and time again. "You are mine and I love you. I will do everything in my power to keep you from harm." Yet, time after time I have doubted and strayed, even to the point of causing self-inflicted pain and harm. Then it came to me, if I can feel the overwhelming desire and need to love and protect a rescued dog, then surely, on some level, I can understand God's overwhelming desire to love and protect me; and I can trust that he is always there and only wants the best for me.

Perhaps it's time for me to show God the same trust that I seek from Easton.

""For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."" Jeremiah 29:11

My Prayer:

Thank you Lord for loving and protecting me, for only wanting the best for me. Help me to trust you in all things and to always be willing to answer your call and to seek safety in your love. Amen.

Happy New Year!

For many the new year is a time of resolution to do better, to start again. I'm not much on New Year's resolutions. My son would tell you that's because I can't remember most things for 365 minutes, so I'm sure not going to be able to remember to do something for 365 days! He may very well be right. But whatever the reason, I haven't made New Year's resoltutions for several years.

Instead of making resolutions for an entire year, I am learning to make daily resolutions. My daily resolution is live by "WWGHMD". I'm sure you have heard of the saying "WWJD" (what would Jesus do). It's a great saying, and the world would certainly be a better place if we all lived by that moto; but personally, I've always had a hard time grasping it. I just couldn't get my mind around the concept. How could an imperfect someone like me, possibly know what a pure, sinless person like Jesus would do? It's just too overwhelming. Instead of WWJD, I found something that does work for me: WWGHMD. Admittidly, it's not near as catchy, but it works for me: WWGHMD - What Would God Have Me Do.

Although I can't imagine what Jesus would do in a given situation; through prayer and study, I can determine what God would have me do. Actually, Jesus gives us the big picture answer - Love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul and all your might AND love your neighbor as yourself. Now all I have to do, with God's help is to learn to apply it to all situations. And, the really good thing about daily resolutions is I get to start over every day! So for today I resolve to ask WWHGMD.

"I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future. Then you will call my name. you will come to me and pray to me. And when you search for me with all your heart, you will find me." Jeremiah 29:11-13 NCV

My Prayer:

God, what would you have me do this minute, this hour, this week, this month and this year. Teach me to love you above all else and to love my neighbor as myself. Amen.